Flying Terminology :-))

Subj: Flying Terminology AIRSPEED - Speed of an airplane. (Deduct at least 25% when listening to a fighter pilot.) BANK - An institution that hold the lien on most pilot's cars. CARBURETOR ICING - A phenomenon reported to the FAA by pilots immediately  after they run out of gas. CONE OF CONFUSION - An area about the size of New Jersey located near the  final approach fix at an airport. DEAD RECKONING - You reckon correctly, or you are. DESTINATION - Geographical location 15 minutes beyond the pilot's bladder  saturation point. ENGINE FAILURE - A condition that always results when all fuel tanks  mysteriously become filled with low-octane air. FIREWALL - Section of the aircraft specifically designed to funnel heat  and smoke into the cockpit. FLIGHT FOLLOWING - 1. Formation flying 2. Bird watching. GLIDE DISTANCE - Half the distance from an airplane to the nearest  emergency landing field. HOBBS METER - An instrument requiring an immediate emergency landing if  should it fail during dual instruction. HYDROPLANE - An airplane landing long and "hot" on a short and very wet  runway. LEAN MIXTURE - Nonalcoholic beer. MINI MAG LITE - Device designed to support the AAA battery industry. NANOSECOND - Time delay between the Low Fuel Warning light and the onset  of carburetor icing (see above). PARASITIC DRAG - A pilot who bums a ride and complains about the service. RICH MIXTURE - What you order at another pilot's promotion party. ROGER - Used when you have no idea about what else to say. SECTIONAL CHART - Any chart that ends 25 nm short of your destination. SERVICE CEILING - Altitude above which the cabin crew cannot serve drinks. SPOILERS - 1. FAA Inspectors. 2. Box lunches STALL - Technique used to explain to the bank why your car payment is late. STEEP BANKS - Banks that charge pilots more than 10% interest. TURN & BANK INDICATOR - An instrument largely ignored by pilots. USEFUL LOAD - Volumetric capacity of the aircraft, disregarding weight. WAC CHART - Directions to the Army female barracks. YANKEE - Any pilot who has to ask New Orleans tower to "Say again".