Flying Terminology :-))



Subj: Flying Terminology
AIRSPEED - Speed of an airplane. (Deduct at least 25% when listening to a
fighter pilot.)

BANK - An institution that hold the lien on most pilot's cars.

CARBURETOR ICING - A phenomenon reported to the FAA by pilots immediately 
after they run out of gas.

CONE OF CONFUSION - An area about the size of New Jersey located near the 
final approach fix at an airport.

DEAD RECKONING - You reckon correctly, or you are.

DESTINATION - Geographical location 15 minutes beyond the pilot's bladder 
saturation point.

ENGINE FAILURE - A condition that always results when all fuel tanks 
mysteriously become filled with low-octane air.

FIREWALL - Section of the aircraft specifically designed to funnel heat 
and smoke into the cockpit.

FLIGHT FOLLOWING - 1. Formation flying 2. Bird watching.

GLIDE DISTANCE - Half the distance from an airplane to the nearest 
emergency landing field.

HOBBS METER - An instrument requiring an immediate emergency landing if 
should it fail during dual instruction.

HYDROPLANE - An airplane landing long and "hot" on a short and very wet 
runway.

LEAN MIXTURE - Nonalcoholic beer.

MINI MAG LITE - Device designed to support the AAA battery industry.

NANOSECOND - Time delay between the Low Fuel Warning light and the onset 
of carburetor icing (see above).

PARASITIC DRAG - A pilot who bums a ride and complains about the service.

RICH MIXTURE - What you order at another pilot's promotion party.

ROGER - Used when you have no idea about what else to say.

SECTIONAL CHART - Any chart that ends 25 nm short of your destination.

SERVICE CEILING - Altitude above which the cabin crew cannot serve drinks.

SPOILERS - 1. FAA Inspectors. 2. Box lunches

STALL - Technique used to explain to the bank why your car payment is late.

STEEP BANKS - Banks that charge pilots more than 10% interest.

TURN & BANK INDICATOR - An instrument largely ignored by pilots.

USEFUL LOAD - Volumetric capacity of the aircraft, disregarding weight.

WAC CHART - Directions to the Army female barracks.

YANKEE - Any pilot who has to ask New Orleans tower to "Say again".


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